


Arackniss Week: Human AU

by deadlegato



Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2020-11-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:35:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27755464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deadlegato/pseuds/deadlegato
Summary: Hear me out: What if they could be both humans AND animals at the same time?
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	Arackniss Week: Human AU

“I don’t know, Anthony. I mean… I know you do this all the time, and you’re happy with it, but…”

“Nuh-uh-uh!” the extremely tall man in the white spider fursuit chided. “Call me Angel Dust when I’m in character! It’s my character name.”

“You pick the worst possible names,” the uncomfortable shorter brother in the grey spider costume said, fidgeting. “I’m not sure I want to go by the name you came up for me.”

“What’s wrong with Arackniss? I think it’s cute. You could always go by Niss,” the taller spider said.

“If pops finds out that I went to a furry con with you… or that I’m interested in this stuff…” the shorter brother said, looking around nervously. He hoped no one he knew was there. Although, if they were there, didn’t that mean they also had to be into it?

“He won’t, so relax and have fun. Oh, boy. Look at the biceps on that tiger. Rawr.”

“Why are you like this?” ‘Arackniss’ sighed.

“Why don’t we go through the dealer’s room first?”

“… I don’t want to see you adding to your limited-edition dildo collection. I’ll pass. I’ll just… wander around and maybe catch a panel.”

This isn’t the worst thing, he thought to himself, aimlessly trawling the halls. Everyone seemed really friendly. They didn’t even seem to mind that his costume had been thrown together by his brother and wasn’t the best thing ever. The extra fake arms were kind of saggy and overstuffed. 

He paused to watch some people take pictures of someone in a steampunk snake costume. “Nice costume,” he said slowly, uncertain of how to talk to strangers properly.

“Thank you. Oh, dear, one of your arms is ripping a bit. Let me help you,” whoever was in the costume said, pulling out a sewing kit from one of the dozens of leather pockets he had on his outfit. “Hold still so I don’t accidentally stab you.” The one in the snake costume had a high-pitched voice, and he couldn’t tell if he was faking the British accent to go with the costume or if it was real. “There, fixed.”

“Thanks. My brother made it for me. This is my… first con. I’m still not sure I want to get into the scene. I’m impressed you can move around in that thing.”

“The tail is remote controlled.”

“Aw, shoot, I’m supposed to meet my brother at dealer’s room and now I’m late and I’m not sure where it is.”

“Let me show you, if you don’t mind that I can’t move that quickly in this.”

When they arrived, his brother was booty dancing in front of dealer’s room while people filmed him. ‘Arackniss’ sighed deeply. “My brother’s fursona is a spider stripper.”

“I can tell you’re a spider, but are you a spider mobster?”

“He knows the Godfather is my favorite film, and we’re Italian-American. He thought it would make a good uh… fursona… I guess… for me. He even bought two identical suits so he could cut the arms off the second one to make my outfit. Oh, I haven’t asked your name yet. I’m… well, for now, I’m Arackniss. Not sure if I’ll keep that name.”

“Hello, Arackniss. I’m Sir Pentious.”

“Really? Sir?”

“My character was knighted after…” the snake costumer rattled on and on about his character, and Arackniss found it frankly cute. He hadn’t thought that in depth on his character yet. The only things he’d decided was that he was a mobster spider and that his specialty was working as a hit man.

“I should have you help me develop my character,” he said when the snake was finally finished talking. “If I ask my brother, he’ll just want to give it an angsty tragic backstory that will sound like a thirteen-year-old emo kid wrote it. I mean, no offense to thirteen-year-old emo kids. I just know how my brother writes.”

“Hey, bro! Who’s your new… friend… wait a minute! I know you! I’ve seen your avatar. You tried to take over Cherri’s VR chat server!”

“It was abandoned by the former admin and it was open to anyone! I got there first and she tried to steal it from me!”

“You and your stupid sock puppet accounts are annoying. We know it’s you behind all those egg themed accounts.”

“You have no proof!” the snake snapped back.

“Hey, hey, guys, can we stop fighting?”

“Fine. My panel on crossplay is about to start anyway,” Angel Dust huffed.

“Wait, you’re also on that panel?” the snake asked. “I’m on the panel because I make corsets.”

“Well, isn’t this going to be _fun_?”


End file.
